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Cheating in November

Now that October is over, and Halloween has come and gone, I really only have two more things to look forward to this year: November and Christmas.

However, before I dive in to my plans for these last two months, let’s take a look back on my surprisingly boring October.

A couple of weeks ago, I got very sick for about a week. High fever, severely swollen throat, etc. It was gross, uncomfortable, and I’m still waiting for my voice to come back.

Before that episode, I volunteered at the haunt for one night. Turned out, they were really short-staffed, and yet, we managed to pull off a pretty great show. I placed top scene in Madhouse, and madhouse placed Top House for the night. No major problems. It was all-in-all a good night.

Yesterday, I carved a pumpkin for the first time. Me being me, I had to go unorthodox, and decided to carve a TARDIS, which, though I was tempted to give up several times, turned out pretty good.

Afterwards, I went Trick-or-treating with my sister, her man, and their son. The itty bitty was dressed as Mario, complete with a mustache that covered half of his face. He also managed to prove that Mustaches make the costume, little kids can make anyone trying to be scary laugh, and a five year old that says “thank you” makes out like a bandit on Halloween.

Now, as November pushes October ahead, thoughts of writing and cooking replace the spiders and zombies, just as paper Turkeys replace felt ghosts in all the major shopping centers. It’s time to begin writing for NaNoWriMo, and planning ways to make thanksgiving dinner better.

As for my writing, I’m picking up a story that I’d put aside for months. Every time I opened the document, I started turning a bit green, so I hid it away, and this month, I’m going to pick it back up and, hopefully, finish it by New Year’s. I suppose, in a way, it’s cheating. I’ve already got 19k words done on it, so I think I’ll reset the word count and just add the 50k words over the next 30 days. This month promises to be about as sleepless as October was last year, and I’m oddly okay with that.

Oh! And the fair! As of yesterday, the Greater Agricultural Fair is now open. Rides, unhealthy, overpriced food, animals, and terrible music make for the perfect wind-down from Halloween, leading back to the obligatorily family-friendly Christmas. Yay!

And of course, the world ends in December, so we have that to look forward to. With any luck, I won’t have to buy anyone Christmas presents.

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Yet another short hiatus. Also, Wings!

I apologize, but I’d gotten sucked into the TARDIS and only just made it back to my own time stream.

Anyway, I thought I’d make today’s blog a little DIY manual for my crafty friends out there.

“What cute craft project do you have in store for us?” You’re probably not wondering. Well, this one is multipurpose! Yayyy!

You can use it for a costume, or if you just want to sit in a public area and confuse the hell out of the random passerby, or if you’re into whimsical photography, or if you’re into whimsical hipster pictures taken with instagram. Whatever your fancy, this is pretty neat.

Pretty wings for people who like to be difficult.

You will need:

Old stockings or pantyhose in whatever color floats your boat

Several wire hangers or a spool of thick wire.

Wire cutters. Nice heavy ones.

Needle-nose pliers. or whatever pliers you fancy.

Incense stick (Alternatively, you can use a hot pointed metal thing, but I’m assuming my readers are as… special… as me, and the hot pointed metal thing is probably a bad idea.)

Glitter!

Glue

Thinner wire

Electrical tape (Or duct tape, but electrical holds up better for this.)

Two long ribbons

Hot glue. (Adult supervision required. This goes for you, too, Kristen.)

Your choice of paint. (Optional. The glitter’s optional, too, but let’s face it, who passes up glitter?)

Have all your supplies? Let’s get to it!

Step 1: Shape

The size of your wings depends on the number of wire hangers or the amount of thick wire you’re using. You can make teeny tiny ones for a baby or some poor defenseless pet, or great big ones, it’s really up to you. Just remember that the nylon stockings only stretch so far. Unless you’re going for a patchwork look, and I’ll get to that later. This is a basic how-to.

First and foremost, untwist and straighten the hangers or thick wire as best you can. You can clip them to size or twist some together now if you like. Now pretend you’re a bender robot and bend that wire into a basic wing shape. Add curvy bits if you like or just do a rounded-ish wing like a flutterby. (Ever notice all my tutorials have a lot of “Your choice”s in them?) Make sure the ends of your wire can come together, and use your pliers to twist the ends tightly and wrap them in thinner wire and electrical tape. You don’t want wire ends stabbing you while you’re trying to pretend you’re a fairy. Unless you’re into that.

Rinse and repeat for another wing, and a second lower set, if you want a nice full set of wings.

Got the shape now? No? Well, somebody doesn’t like to follow directions. I’m not waiting for you.

Step 2: Stretchy stretchy

Assuming you’ve kept the elasticity of the nylon stockings in mind, your frame should fit just fine into it. If it’s looser than you anticipated, simply stretch is out more and clip to fit. To secure it, you can either melt the opening a little, or just tape it up with electrical tape. I always recommend the tape.

Always.

Moving on.

Step 3: Decorate and make a huge mess.

Now you get to do the fun part. Paints, glitter, glue, leaves, dangly bits, small dogs, whatever you want to decorate your wings with, have at. You can use a lit incense stick or hot metal poky thing to melt controlled designs in the nylon, as long as you’re careful, Kristen.

Once you’re done decorating, there’s one last step. Ready? No? Okay, let’s move on.

Step 4: Ribbons. Ribbons everywhere!

Arrange your wings the way you’d want them while you’re wearing them, secure them with lots of tape and wire, and then attach your ribbons so they can be tied over your shoulders. You can substitute elastic bands, but what’s the fun in that? What? Oh yeah, it’s easier. Whatever floats your goat.

Now let everything dry completely.

Completely, Kristen.

Once that’s all done, tie those babies on and run around your local shopping mall like a kid whose mom doesn’t care if they get diabetes.

Hope you enjoyed my serious, informative tutorial on a completely serious project. I’ll be back next time with a somethingsomethingsomething.

Ciao!

These are a few of my favorite things

My interests are, to put it lightly, eclectic. I never really ‘grew up’ and, let’s be completely honest, I don’t really plan to. So, I thought I’dshare some of my favorite things with my lovely readers in the hopes that we can connect on a deeper, more intimate level.

;D

1.) Stuffed Animals

Now, as a 90’s kid, I had my share of Beanie Babies and Cabbage Patch Kids and the like, but my favorite toys were always the ones that looked like an Addams would have designed it. I’m sure you know the ones I’m talking about. The teddy bears with the purposefully missing ears, stuffed bunnies with X’s for eyes, or some generic animal with mismatched buttons eyes and a broken felt heart sewn onto it’s chest.

These are called Critters. Hand designed, hand sewn, and totally adorable. Every Critter can be ordered sans buttons, if you decide you want to sacrifice your happiness and buy one of these for a child instead of yourself, and, if you’re anything like me, these little squishies are pretty much irresistible.

Where can I get one? You’ll inevitably ask after seeing those lovable faces. Well, readers, you’re in luck! Critters can be adopted online at crittersdot.com 

Just be careful you don’t become a Critter hoarder. Or do, your choice.

2.) Books!

I am an avid, but picky reader. I love fantasy novels above all else, and a really good fantasy book can make you forget that you have a job… and a life… and responsibilities. For instance, my favorite authors are David Eddings, and Anne McCaffrey. If you’re a fan of fantasy and you haven’t heard of either of them you’re definitely missing out. Like, living under a rock missing out. Seriously, dude, do you even know what paper is, or is that too young for you?

3.) COFFEEEEEE

I’m sure any of you who know me are totally unsurprised that this is in my list, but hey, not everyone knows me. I am a coffee fiend. Not a snob, though. Honestly, Starbucks can suck my beans. But I do love me some flavored coffees. Harmony Bay makes an absolutely DELICIOUS hazelnut creme coffee. Imagine a cloud from heaven descended with a single, enormous golden hazelnut, fragrant as can be, and Harmony Bay ground it down, cloud and all and sold it. That’s this coffee.

Also, while Dunkin’ Donuts was helping promote for the newish MIB movie, they had that black cocoa creme iced coffee that was “out of this world”. Haha. Ha. I’m funny.

But yes, this:

Was the most delicious surprise my best friend had ever woken me up with. When I heard they weren’t selling them anymore, I nearly smashed the drive-thru menu.

Oh sweet coffee. Come back to me one day, that I may devour your deliciousness.

Ahem. On with the list. Last but not least

4.) Vidyagamez!!

So, I’m not the most adamant gamer in the world, by far, but there are some games that make me as happy as a clam. Usually, I stick to RPGs, since most FPSs bring out the wuss in me, but, like all rules, there are exceptions. My all time favorite would definitely be Final Fantasy 7, with 8 and 9 coming in close behind. I’ve also been known to show people my pokemanz. When I have access to a decent computer, I like to vent my rage by killing pixelated bad guys on the MMO City of Heroes. Something about fighting fake crime just makes me feel important. There’s also Portal, Halo and Half-life, though I’m not very good at any of them, and some very old PSX games, which are, like the FF games, played on an emulator on my laptop. In the PC category, we have Neverwinter Nights, which, if you haven’t played, but you like games like Dungeon Siege and Diablo, I’d recommend, and The Sims. They’ve gotten progressively more addicting as each game comes out, and I find myself geeking out over almost very change. Like when they added a fountain building tool thingy. I got so excited, my best friend had to slap me and tell me to shut it. I’m too broke to afford any of the expansions, but I can entertain myself just fine playing God on the base games.

Well, now you know a few of my obsessions. Feel free to leave a comment and tell me what you like to waste your life with.

Ciao!